Zero.

I'm about to begin my homework. :/ Start/Finish Science Fair Research Paper, a Tri-Fold Brochure, Research The Battle of Gettysburg, Reread Chapter 10 for Guided Reading...(that's what I get for reading ahead!), umm I have to work on my portfolio, annddd writing. Busy night. My step dad is going to go see a movie at midnight. Aww, I shulda went. Stupid homework. I'm going to try to finish all of my homework assignments before midnight!
Listening to the radio (Lady Gaga in on-Paparazzi), have to switch the laundry in a few minutes, and work out. How am I supposed to do all of this in less than 1...2...4...5...5 hours? Well it must be done. I ain't gonna fall behind thank you very much.
Friday was hectic. Too much drama.

I wrote a poem about it...okay here goes somethin:
Friday was a wake up call.
I need to change.
No,
i have to.
I'm trying to grow,
to change my ways.
To make myself happy again,
to live for me.
I'm not as light as a feather
yet.
But I will be;
I'm working on it.
I will soon be
the feather.
Light as can be.
Zero guilt.
Zero gossip.
Zero insults.
Zero weight.
Zero.
Free as can be.
Floating high into
the sky.
I will soon be
the feather.
Floating high into
the sky,
set free,
just for me!
:)

I have no clue if it makes sense or not to you. But to me it does. It has different meanings. Maybe the right person will get it. Tell me, are you the right person? What did this poem mean to you? If it meant anything at all to you. Or did it effect you? Have you every had a Friday that made your stomach curl into a knot of pain? And I'm not talking about PMSing. :P
Well that's it for tonight. I have to go do some homework. And ohh crap! The laundry!
Bye!

Slowly.

I wrote a poem last night, so I am going to put it up.
Here it is:
the flower that wilted,
the town that was known forever,
they were both forgotten slowly.
the flower died coldly,
never got the water,
and was always left in the sun.
that night it died along with
the town,
where it had all begun.
the fire burned it all.
even the flower,
even all the holy,
even the kids
who were
screaming
till the
end.
they all died slowly,
the flower and the town were killed.
and when the last one fell,
the new day begun ever so
quickly.

Okay, don't ask why I kept saying slowly, it is just a fun word to put in there. I might redo it. So watch out for another version! I wrote that at 10:54 p.m. last night. Like it? Maybe? Ehhh. Mkay. That's all I have to say.

P.S. 2 more days till school. ugh.

:D

Twirling. Swirling. Whirling.

i am tired-
mentally and physically. And it's not late whatsoever! Right now i'm listening to The Taste Of Ink by The Used. My aunt got me into this song...i like it. i don't know, it's catchy. Like a melody that you can't get out of your head, or a buzzing bee that really likes the red tank top you have on, and won't leave you alone. Well the song isn't annoying like that bee that is just about to sting you, but instead of giving it a chance to sting you-you smack it away with the back of your hand. And when you look at your hand you have a line of bright red blood, the little sucker still stung you. So of course now you automatically hate bees because of that one little incident that happened oh i don't know about 3 years and 14 days ago. And for all you know that bee is either dead or alive...still buzzing in your ear threatening to sting you again. But you know that's impossible because we all know that bees die once they sting something. And while your rethinking this, you just happen to be wearing that same red shirt that you wore when that act happened, 3 years ago.

Sorry, i babbled. But doesn't it seem like a start of something? Maybe i'll continue it...mhmmm how did i go from talking about music to a bee? I tell ya! i'm a strange one. Or i just have an imagination. ;0

Back to the song. Well now i'm listening to the song Smother Me. By The Used (big surprise). This song reminds me of the beach at sunset. The sand is still cooling off from the long hot day. And you are alone-watching the sunset by yourself. Humming the lyrics from this song. And whether you like it or not the song is replaying over and over again. Someone left it on repeat and you kinda like it. So you go with the flow, and your feet gliding in the soothing warm sand. Taking steps to the beat, wider now. More graceful. At the same time the song picks up the rhythm. You start to run and hop. Your dress picking up and whirling around because the wind likes your enthusiasm. Twirling. Swirling. Whirling. Forget humming you sing full blast. You are alone. Loving it, and no one is with you to judge you. You enjoy every bit. The song's tempo slows, and you drop to the sandy floor slowly. Knees first, then your bum. Your body swaying along with the harmony. Your heart beat slows and you sit still, looking into the sun setting just as the song ends.

i want to go to the beach now.
And dance to this song.
i think i might do that one day-if i do i'll tell you guys.
So that's about it. i hope you enjoyed my little tale. :D C ya!

You Think.

Before you know it-
they are gone.
The loved ones,
the best friend,
the boy who got away.
The unforgotten love.
The one
who never got the love.
And of course,
the love that was there,
but disintegrated
before given.
Gone.
The love is
gone and never given,
because that one person
abandoned the love,
left it in a
head to toe dusty closet filled with
other erased emotions.
Joy.
Happiness.
Acceptance.
Awe.
Passion.
But of course,
Rage is smothering you,
Envy is always there,
Fear is never hiding,
and
Suffering will remind you of love itself.
You Think They Are Gone,
but really they are just waiting.
Waiting for your dignity to be
Gone.

-
-
Do you like it?
Took me longer than normally,
but i think that's because i haven't been writing poetry for a while! So what can i say? i'm a bit lazy. But i promise i will write more poetry tonight and post it later! Wait n See!!!

Taking A Walk On The Wild Side

when you walk,
there are two options.
the safe side,
and the wild side.
sometimes you don't know which one is which.
but you have a gut instinct.
that instinct is usually the safe side.
the right
thing to do.
to keep you from trouble.
but occasionally your gut instinct
tells you to do take a walk
on the wild side.
danger.
how wild will you go?
that is up to you.
how far will
you push
yourself,
is
based on you personality,
and actions.
so tell me,
are you gonna take a walk on the wild side?

Okay i'll admit i'm a bit rusty,
but once you learn something you can't really forget it. Mhhmm...how do i put this? it's in your gut hahaha! ironic isn't it?

What inspired me to write that poem, was walking. i was walking up hills and down them, and then back up them again! Another reason to be sore. So back to hills. They were a pain, but i realized that there are two paths on the sidewalk. Well i've always noticed that, don't get me wrong, i'm not that slow! And well two sides reminded me of heaven and hell. 2 paths that you can go, 2 ways you can go. Now i'm not religious, so i don't really have a belief that i completely rely on. Heaven and Hell. Bam! 2 paths, 2 paths on a sidewalk, 2 choices. Good-Bad. Safe/Careful-Risky/Wild. 2 opposites. Get where i'm coming from?! Ehh? Okay well hopefully that explained it enough. I gotta go, my dad's bugging me to get off. So see ya!

The Lifter And My Books

Okay, yesterday i worked out. But my arms are sore, and my abdomens hurt every single time i move. Now i'm not out of shape but it's not like the gym is my favorite place to be. So yes i work out if you were wondering. Now i don't know the name of the machine that made me sore, but it's like you have to hold yourself up and lift you legs up. Mhhmmm...let's call it the lifter kay? i did about 100 sets of them, even though my cousin was telling me that i would regret it in the morning. Of course i didn't listen, and "OMG!" Well i wouldn't call it torture, that's a bit too harsh. So now, i'm sore, and this morning it bit me in my...well you get the point.
Speaking of working out, i'm leaving back to Chicago in 2 weeks. Ack! California is great. Chicago is great. How am i supposed to pick between the two? Speaking of Chicago, i haven't been writing poetry. :( My poetry books has been writing letters to me, and they all miss me dearly. Here's a letter they all wrote together:

Dear Elle,

We all understand that California is great, and you've been terribly busy, but can't you take sometime to write here and there? Would it hurt you? I know you are sore, but maybe just a little? Even in your mind, once in a while think of us. Think of poetry. Think of rhyming, and letters, and a pen. Think of the pen that you write poetry with. We beg you, come back to us.

With Love,
Your Lonely Books

There you have it folks! My books miss me, should i go back to them? Or go to the gym? Ha! Just kidding. i think.

Well i gotta go,
check back in with you guys later!

Tired

i did a lot today...for me. Went shopping then went to eat and find food at 3 different places. i went with my step sister. She can drive. Driving is fun yet scary, you never know what will happen to the car. it can crash or blow up any minute. Not likely but could still happen.
You could spin out of control on the freeway killing you,
injuring the passenger,
and 2 other cars come down with you.
i'm not going to get into the gory details but you never know.
never.
i just realized that i'm dead tired even though its only 9 out here,
but hey i woke up around 5:40 A.M.
yeah not good.
you can tell i'm sleepy because i started off with capitalization with each sentence (except words that start with "i") and now i'm not doing any.
run on sentence,
never-ending blinking try to keep
myself awake.
my whole body telling me to stop typing,
and sleep.
sleep.
hope you get enough sleep,
unlike me.
maybe i should take my own advice.
okay good
night,
chicago,
and california.
<3333

Tears and Laughter

that night.
i cried,
but i also
laughed.
about nothing
in particular.
do you really
need a reason,
to cry
or laugh?
some
people would
say yes,
and some would
say no.
for they cannot
help it,
it's how
they were
raised.
even
though they're
being
selfish,
in a
way.
do you really need
a reason
to
cry?
is it not
good for
enough
for your alibi?
is that why?


think about that

Flowers.

Flowers.
So Sunny And Bright!
When The Suns Out,
At Least.
But Have You Ever
Wondered What Flowers
Do
At
Night?
Or At Least What They
Look Like?
Are They Still Sunny, Bright,
And Cheerful?
Or Are They Sad, Blue,
And Heavyhearted?
Do They Cry And Weep?
Or,
Do They Party All Night
Long?
I Once Knew A Boy
Who Would Dream About
Flowers.
The Flowers Were Moody,
And Emotional.
At least To Him.
Flowers.
What Do You Dream They'd
Do?

Poetry

Different
Different,
It's Hard To Be Different,
Well For Some People Anyways.
But Not For Me.
For Some People It's
Easier
Just To
Blend
In.
But Not For Me.
It's Not Like I Asked
For
This
Fate.
No, Not At All.
But I Got What I Got,
No
Refunds.
Don't Get Me Wrong!
Being Different.
Well It's Fun.
Fun For Me,
And I Love Being
Well,
Different.


Death.
Death
Is
Calm
And
Fast.
Another Stage
To
Life.
Life Is Like
The Weather.
Unpredictable.
But Both Of Them Having
A Few Things In
Common.
Because With Weather
And Life,
You Have Control.
The Key Is
Whether You Want
To Take It Or
Not.
With Weather,
You Can Choose The
Weather By Where You
Live.
But Life,
Well If You Run-Away
To A Better Place,
Well That's Called Death.

More Poetry

Challenge
Fear.
I'm scared
But Of What?
Life.
I'm Scared Of Life.
Because Life Is Hard,
And Maybe I'm Not Up
For The
Challenge.
Sometimes I Wish,
I Wish I Could Just
Skip Life And Go Straight
To
Death.
But I Can't,
First I Have To
Beat The Game.
The Game Of Life.
Then The Sequel;
Death.
Maybe I Am Up To The Challenge.

Poetics

Who Am I?
Pain,
Physically + Emotionally
They Both Hurt You,
No Matter Who You Are.
But It Depends On Who
You Are.
Do You Know Who You Are?
And If You Know Who You Are,
Well Then,
Who Do You Think You Are?
Who Do You Want To Be?
How Are You Gonna' Be It?
When You Be It,
Will That Make You A Better
Person?
Physically + Emotionally?

Don't Forget to Write
If You Want To Find Out Who You Truly Are,
Well Don't Come To Me,
Go To Yourself.
It's A journey,
But You Have To Do It
By Yourself.
You Don't Need Anyones Help,
Only You.
Honestly,
You Never Needed Anyones Help,
Guidance,
Maybe.
But Not Help.
Because You Can Always
Help Yourself.

Just You.

So Take That Journey,
Write A Story,
And Tell Me How It Goes!